Women Over 40 Share What They Wish Everyone Knew About Perimenopause

Perimenopause is routinely confused for menopause, according to Dr Samantha Wild, clinical lead for women’s health at Bupa. “Often when people talk about ‘going through the menopause’ they’re actually talking about the perimenopause,” she shared.

The perimenopause is when your hormone levels start to change, typically when women reach their mid-40s (but it can happen earlier). It ends when you reach menopause, which is considered to be when you haven’t had a period for 12 months.

This confusion between perimenopause and menopause can lead to women being told that they’re “too young” to be experiencing menopause symptoms.

One person shared her experience of this in the Women Over 40 Reddit community, and urged others to “stop saying women over 40 are ‘too young’ to be experiencing perimenopause symptoms”, as it’s “so frustrating”.

“I am 47 and feeling as moody and overwhelmed as ever, I’m getting strange rashes, periods are getting closer together and heavier, and I’m so, so tired,” she shared. “95% of the women in my family and around 90% of the women I meet in the wild all say I’m too young for ‘that’.”

She added: “Just be nice and understand it’s not an easy time!”

Women rallied to offer their advice and support

“I don’t even believe the [doctors] when they say you’re too young,” said one respondent. “They have no clue. I know what my body is saying, I just need the knowledge to help it.”

Discussing what had helped them through it, they added: “HRT, good food, amazing company, rest, therapy and exercise has been a game changer for me. It gets better, but it changes day to day.”

Another Reddit user chimed in: “I just have this advice: Surround yourself with people who support you and help you, not those who dismiss what you’re feeling or make you feel like your emotions aren’t valid. They’re not your tribe.”

One respondent offered validation and solidarity, sharing how they went into surgical menopause at the age of 39. “I was in perimenopause when I had to get a full hysterectomy,” they said. 

“I can fully verify that I was going through the beginning phases of it all. Less sleep, less sex drive, lower energy, collagen and elastin drop. It’s real! Menopause is the real bitch, but perimenopause sucked pretty badly too.”

Finally, a user admitted: “I wish someone had told me in my early 40s that my night sweats, migraines, and general desire to murder people was the start of menopause.”

If you think you may be perimenopausal, The Menopause Charity has a range of resources to support you through treatment and management. 

Symptoms can include irregular or heavy periods, feeling fatigued, muscle pain and joints, reduced thyroid function and low iron levels.