My parents died two months apart – then I became homeless

Roughly 15 years ago, I became homeless, and I have been for the last 10 years (Picture: PA)

Growing up in a loving family in a nice home, you never expect to wind up homeless.   

My mum died late 1995, my father just two months later. I was 34 and had the whole world ahead of me: They left me the house where they lived out their retirement; It had a small mortgage and I eventually planned to live in it.

Outside, however, nearby roadworks were taking place and my home was flooded during it. 

I was left to pay £90,000 of damage caused. As my family hadn’t got the right home insurance, it would have been too costly for me to have taken this to court and I lived in this damp, dark house for four years getting it all put right. I was about a month off bankruptcy when I managed to sell it, but was left with nothing.    

It meant that, roughly 15 years ago, I became homeless, and I have been for the last 10 years having spent a few years living in a custom van. 

With nothing to lose I decided to try and live my dream of becoming a filmmaker, having made a film about an Mi6 agent before losing my home. My parents came from London and I’d grown up there for a time, so I decided to go back.

I decided to try and live my dream of becoming a filmmaker (Picture: David Fussell)

The art and creativity I’ve always loved came from my family: Dad read poetry and my nan gave me a beaten up guitar when I was seven, which I banged around on. I loved it.   

I arrived at Paddington Station one weekend in October 2013, not really knowing anyone and carrying just a few possessions, including a brass lighter and hard drives with my film content.  

I surmised there’d be more of the support in a big city and I got lucky: a wonderful man at the job centre directed me to the West London Day Center, which provided support like cooked meals and Christmas night shelters for young people in my position.

It has long-since closed but through the Center I connected with charities like St Mungo’s that still help me to this day.  

Another charity helped me get accommodation in Hackney, an area of London I loved. I was off the street over Christmas but the place had a cockroach infestation and I still didn’t know how or where to get food. I ate ham sandwiches for Christmas dinner that year.   

I slept in the doorway of Heels department store on Tottenham Court Road (Picture: David Fussell)

I knew I wanted to work my way out and after eight months, I got a job for the Next store in Fenchurch Street. The manager had experienced homelessness himself and gave me a chance.

I saved anything I could for equipment to finish editing my film – but the benefits system was my undoing. My wages fluctuated because I worked part-time and I found keeping the government updated really difficult.

Plus, the balance between benefits and wages meant I was left with nothing at the end of the week. It became a bureaucratic nightmare and I ended up on the streets.   

For the next four years, I slept in the doorway of Heels department store on Tottenham Court Road with a couple of friends. We all worked. I’d catch an early bus over to Next for the 5am deliveries, which meant bedding down early.

A group of lads were giving me and my friends trouble and somebody threw a bottle that smashed in my face

Homeless outreach teams would sometimes wake you up to check you were still alive – it’s very important work but not the best when you have an early shift!  

Once or twice I was in charge of opening up, which made me nervous; I was sleeping on the streets with the keys to a major store in the city. Working with everyday regular people was a pick-me-up, though, and having that structure around me really helped. I could see my worth.  

After a couple of years, I’d made enough money to do the pre-production of my film. It doesn’t matter whether you’re a millionaire or sitting on the street corner, you should have an aim in life and for me that was my film.

I made it to a few community art groups where I got some training with a camera and could do a bit of filmmaking. I also did some open-mic nights, singing and playing the guitar, which was a wonderful way of meeting other people.   

It doesn’t matter whether you’re a millionaire or sitting on the street corner, you should have an aim in life and for me that was my film (Picture: PA)

Everything changed in the summer of 2019. A group of lads were giving me and my friends trouble and somebody threw a bottle that smashed in my face, leaving me semi-concussed and with a terrible cut to my forehead. Later on, my rubbish, brick mobile fell out of my sleeping bag and somebody stole it.  

I was in such a bad state that I couldn’t continue on at work. Being homeless is like training for the SAS day after day and it just takes one knock, one trip-up, for everything to become too much.

I woke up with my head pounding, feeling sick and without a way of calling work, I didn’t go back. Just as people burn out in the workplace, I burnt out on the streets.   

I threw myself into editing my film. The old laptop I had didn’t have the right software but a charity called C4WS let me use their Macs and I could finally do the major edit.

Going from this to having the premiere of one of my films in London has been a highlight of my life.

St Mungo’s has been helping me for 10 years both practically and emotionally (Picture: PA)

My film was shown at the Screen on the Green in Islington and to see my name lit up was just magical. Part of the reason I created it was to prove that people experiencing homelessness still have passion and a fantastic set of skills. 

While the film has done really well, it hasn’t helped me financially in the way I’d hoped so I started to look for other opportunities. I heard about the Film BA Honours degree at Falmouth from some friends. I’d never wanted to go to university before, but this course was perfect for me.   

My university interview was disastrous: I couldn’t get the laptop camera to work, and I got caught out when the interviewer asked what part of the course I was most looking forward to.

I was honest: I’d been so busy trying to get to centers and use computers, and that I hadn’t looked at the prospectus. But, I told her, I loved film and media, and I couldn’t imagine there’d be any part I wouldn’t like.

I arrived at university in September 2023. 

I’m getting full funding for my place as well as a student loan, and the university has bent over backwards to help me out. But the funding may not continue and there’s a chance I won’t be able to continue my education.

I look to my front; if I face a massive brick wall, I take a turn but having support from others is vital. Thanks to support and advice from St Mungos, I currently have the privilege of living on a campsite in Cornwall which is beautiful, especially when the weather is superb. 

So many of the places and resources I relied on when I was first homeless have disappeared; I don’t know how people manage on the streets now.

St Mungo’s has been helping me for 10 years both practically and emotionally; they’ve provided counselling and moral support as well as food vouchers.

They’ve also recently helped negotiate on my behalf around debt repayment, which gives me more time to concentrate on my studies. Now they are helping me and others tell our stories.

It’s important that these stories are heard.  

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing [email protected]. 

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