When it comes to a knockout story, the windup is as important as the punch — and some soaps are nailing it.
Cue Drew’s long-awaited whodunnit on General Hospital! The hated congressman got what was coming to him when someone sneaked into his house on a dark and stormy night and shot him twice in the back. The suspects include basically every A-lister in Port Charles. Alexis, Sonny, Curtis, Nina, and Carly outright threatened him with multiple witnesses overhearing, while Portia, Stella, Jason, Michael, Molly, Kristina, Martin, Tracy, Elizabeth, Sidwell, and Willow had good reasons to want him gone. (We know it wasn’t Trina or Kai because they overheard the shots while snooping in Drew’s house.) The buildup took weeks and veered seamlessly from one story to another, with the end game being the same: That guy’s got to go.
Alexis’s threats came from the most innocent place, in that her only crime was trying to protect her granddaughter. Drew served restraining orders on her entire extended family under the guise of “protecting” Scout from her loving grandma, aunts, and brothers.
Alexis: “Sam wanted her children together. You ripped Scout away from Danny and Rocco the first chance you got.”
Drew: “You aligned yourself with Jason, who is a contract killer, and shielded Danny, who is clearly a thug in the making just like his father.”
Alexis: “Shut up! You’re going to hang your despicable actions on a 15-year-old boy who loves his sister? Scout lost her mother, and your solution is to dump her with the help. I will fight you.”
Drew: “And you will lose. I’m a congressman, and you’re a known drunk. You’re not going to see Scout again until she’s 18 — if you’re even still alive.”
Alexis: “When I’m through with you, it’s going to be like you never existed.”
It’s shocking Alexis didn’t off him right there, even with all the witnesses.
Drew’s threats weren’t lost on Scout’s brothers, either.
Danny: “I hate that guy so much.”
Rocco: “Me, too.”
Sonny is an obvious suspect since he’s been battling Drew over the piers, and he was able to gun down an FBI agent last year without so much as an investigation.
Sonny: “Someone is going to take Drew down.”
Alexis: “Do you know something I don’t?”
Sonny: “Sooner or later, that son of a bitch is going to pay.”
Add Nina (“If you hurt my daughter, I’ll see you dead”), Michael (“Drew’s got to be stopped”), Carly (“You mess with my family, I will kill you myself”), Curtis (“This crusade against my family? End it or I will end you”), and Alexis (“Drew has crossed every line, and he can’t be allowed to do that again”), and it’s a well-crafted mystery that could go many different ways.
Props to Curtis, who had the knockout of the week:
Drew: “You spit in my face and took away the woman I love.”
Curtis: “Then maybe you shouldn’t have been screwing her mom.”
Let the finger-pointing begin!
Young and Restless’s Audra isn’t a villain like Drew, but she has needed a take-down for months. She finally got it when Claire told Nate his duplicitous girlfriend made a deal with Victor to fund Vibrante in exchange for seducing Kyle. Audra lied to Nate for weeks, then was forced to come clean. He responded that her willingness to torch their relationship for a job spoke volumes; he’s out.
Nate: “If you can’t see this as a betrayal, there is something wrong with you.”
It’s fun when the pendulum swings back on the baddies.
Meanwhile, Kyle did that dumb soap opera thing where he kept a secret to “protect” Claire, and she made him pay for it. Here’s his proposal in a nutshell: “I kissed Audra, let’s get married!”
In actuality, he got down on one knee, and Claire’s face looked like the exploding head emoji.
Claire: “What are you doing?”
Kyle: “The only person I can imagine loving more than Claire Newman is Claire Abbott. Will you marry me?”
Claire: “You messed up. You want to fix it. So, ‘Hey, let’s get married.’ ”
She cited the red flags sparked by his secrecy and said she doesn’t want to live that way — he can keep his ring. Jack and Diane later worked hard not to say “I told you so” to their stubborn son.
Kyle: “You told me not to push.”
Jack: “It doesn’t mean we wanted to be right.”
Kyle’s been schooled, but what’s next for Claire? She went from lunatic stalker of the Newman family to mousy introvert who bought Kyle’s BS to strong-willed woman inviting Holden to get drunk with her. That’s a lot of wind-ups; hopefully, a punch is coming.
You know what’s overdue for a punch? The Chad/Cat nonsense on Days of Our Lives. The formerly smart Chad DiMera is now kissing the woman who impersonated his dead wife (after she was blackmailed by Clyde Weston into claiming she was Abigail with amnesia and plastic surgery) — against all of his better judgment.
Chad: “I keep telling myself I shouldn’t consider how Abby’s family would react if we become more than friends, but it weighs on me.”
Cat: “They are never going to see me as anything other than the woman who conned your family into believing your wife had miraculously returned.”
Bingo. So, stop it.
Playing Cat with Jack’s retconned daughter Gwen is a head-scratcher because neither has rooting value (especially if you’re a Jack and Jenn fan).
Gwen: “You are the woman who impersonated my late sister Abigail.”
Cat: “You have every right to be angry for what I did to Chad and the Hortons.”
Gwen: “I’m quite impressed. You and I are a lot alike. We both do what we have to to survive and get what we want. I could really use a gal pal.”
Two unlikable con artists who hurt our faves? Pass.
On the bright side, it seems like the looooong windup of the baby saga is about to pay off. Who didn’t laugh when Tate thought the picture from Marlena was of his baby with “her” adoptive parents?
Brady: “That’s the picture that came with the frame.”
Tate: “I can’t believe Sophia would give me a fake photo.”
Oh, Tate. Brady’s got a clue, so he went right to Steve.
Brady: “Why would Sophia give my son a phony image of their child?”
Steve: “Good question. I ran into Javier with that baby who was brought into the firehouse…”
He’s on it!
Is Bold and Beautiful on it? Ridge’s procrastination in telling Taylor he’s changed his mind (again) has not helped the stop-and-start of his, Brooke, and Taylor’s 900th go-round.
Taylor: “Ridge is the man I’ve always wanted. Now that we’re remarrying, he will be — forever!”
Thomas: “It’s amazing, you and Dad back together. After that, Brooke will never interfere with your happiness ever again.”
Are they new here? Let’s skip to the inevitable denouement where Ridge dumps Taylor, and his kids lose their minds, but they still have to work together with Ridge and Brooke, so every day is a soapy mess.
Ridge: “I’ve always loved you.”
Brooke: “Then you need to be true to your word. Are we going to spend the rest of our lives together, or is our love story going to end?”
In other words, punch or get off the pot!
Hey. It’s only my opinion.
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